Past Tense - Bugs, Big Bomb And Zealots Part I


[An earlier version of this PT was originally posted on January 3rd, 2013 on JoBlo's "DVD, Blu-Ray & Home Theater Discussion" forum.]

You can hear them moving in the walls within the ventilation system, foot by foot closer to the well paid and rendered pointless - panic room. If this was a movie there would be a long lingering shot of the bed frame outside of the hidden room with focus on muted sounds.

There was a pause, eyes closed and a fade to slumber then a slight adrenaline rush as you remember what is going on. At this point you are afraid to move from your spot on the floor. Last year those devil dogs had actually pounced on your former home's roof. There is a quick thought of what you will do if that happens here, not much is the answer. Harsh, but honest. So screwed.

Even from this attic spot you can hear muffled howls. They had found the room, unknown if they tumbled in and were - trapped? Or at this point were mauling the vent grate to enter. Then another big idea popped, man - you are slowing. This should've happened before you went up here.

All those areas you had concealed peanut butter and spent paper towel rolls. You could give them reasons, reasons to search elsewhere for you should they get out. Open the jars now and plop the empty rolls inside and fling them on various walls across the home - make them confused. Giving you more time for morning, at least hoping that morning will bring about a new, better day.

You take out the golf club and rush downstairs with the bow clenched; ready to fire arrows as needed. No sign of them as you increase your pace - you have this momentary advantage, don't loose it. Various hidden closets are opened and jars pulled, not daring to open until you're ready to drop them like scented ruses. More slower blinks, "Scented Ruses" sounds like a bathroom odor spray, might be a strong potpourri with some wooded smells - cedar maybe. You shake that thought away.

Not now dude.

Each of the room were baptized with peanut butter and the jar left behind, sealed but not before placing a tiny bit on the lid. None of the peanut butter made contact with your skin or on clothes. That would defeat the defense. Each was hidden away behind a large furniture or inside a room you could lock. Let them fight to get inside.

Five rooms were done before anguished howls were heard. They're inside. And know they've been hoodwinked. No more time for more rooms - what to do with the other sealed jars? You put them inside a nearby cabinet. You rush back to your former spot. And another thought popped.

What if other chupacabras critters heard that wail and come to their aid? While maybe - and that's a big maybe, the panic room will seal them in. What about others who join in? You're back to zero once they finished with the mired chunky paste and hunt you down.

Can't think about this - can't; like a middle age ninja, you race up and return to your attic sanctuary. Locked with the club once more. This time around having your bow and arrows far closer to you. The room is so dark, the outside street lights are still working in the haze and giving just the outline of objects in the refuge from the dusty windows.

Another sound is heard, can't quite make it out. Like banging on metal, kinda chaotic. Then a head shake to keep awake, you're hurting now for sleep. Those adrenaline burst are not lasting when your body is at rest. What was that noise? More dogs? MORE DOGS.

More demon dogs are inside the house and now that sound is registering - they too are inside the vents. But are having trouble navigating, those peanut butter decoys are making them confused - probably like the scent was coming from everywhere.

More than likely they found that open vent from smelling their own - the blood around the grate they chewed and pulled open. How many new ones? Right now that's trivial. The point is to survive the night. Oh man, in the rush you forgot to take your watch or even look at a clock. What time is it now? Whatever - you're not moving from this place, no more Hail Marys to have.

Another long yawn, this one way longer than all the others. Scared. Please don't sleep. Please don't sleep.

"Limited Edition Horror" 2020 continues with week four; hope you have enough cans of Raid for this insect infused interstellar malediction - "Starship Troopers 3"...



"Starship Troopers 3: Marauder" was released on home video on August 5th, 2008. It was a direct-to-video title.

It streeted against "Rogue: Unrated", "Star Trek: Enterprise - The Complete Second Season" and "Lonesome Dove: 2 Disc Collector's Edition".

The basic edition originally came with a cardboard foil slipcover which mirrored the case's wraparound. The only insert was the instructions for the digital copy.

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There were several exclusives. Lets address this alphabetically...



FYE/Suncoast offered an exclusive steelbook case for the film. This is fuzzy, but it appears that it sold for $26.99.

I'm not 100% certain if that was the release day price. It's the best I could do.

Target had two exclusives mixed into one...



First they gave their DVD a lenticular slipcover - different from the wraparound. Inside was the second exclusive; "Mobile Infantry Field Manual", a three page fold-out booklet. This set sold for $16.99. I remember not knowing about it until days later; went to my local store, hoping they would still have one in stock.

Yes, they did; sold my extra copy on eBay (minus the booklet and slipcover).



Wal-Mart had an exclusive disc (in its own case), side packed the regular DVD. This set sold for $19.98. Sorry, no menu screen - single featurette, "On The Bounce: The Making Of Starship Troopers" just plays. A run time of 24:11 minutes. This is where I first bought my copy, sway.

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Footnotes.

There was another exclusive, but not solely for "Marauder". It was for the three movie compendium, released on the same street.



Best Buy had a eight inch limited edition Marauder figurine (unit #04) with "Starship Troopers Trilogy" DVD; entitled "The Ultimate Starship Troopers Collector's Set". This sold for $39.99 (if you just wanted the three disc set, only - $29.99). Didn't have the money at the time, otherwise I would've gotten this too. Don't have much regrets; where would I put this? The box was huge.