Past Tense - He Knows Kung Vamp-Fu Part I


The howl could be felt to the bone. You gave a quick mental inventory of the place. What can be used as an immediate weapon? The first thought was that cooking knife, it wasn't as long as you wished, but can do damage - providing you don't get slice in half by that... thing. You grab it, holding.

That's when eyes fell upon an item in the RV. Something you have, but didn't use in cooking - a bottle of cayenne pepper. This beast may be super strong, but such a thing could blind and make it cry, hard. Even allowing you to flee in the truck. You would have to get close to it. "Hey!" You rush towards the kitchen drawers, searching and find - a turkey baster! This can be filled with pepper, squeezed like your life depended on it. Right to the face in a blast. Critter goes down.

It's a plan. The RV is hit once more. Don't know, could be the other half of that bear, same half or it... ramming the side. You hold in place by grabbing onto the locked table. You filled the baster with powder and used a napkin in a wad to seal the open end, until you're ready.

The rocking gave the third idea. You have a full size fire extinguisher; A, B and C type. You put the baster (neck up) in your pocket, don't dare leave it where you could loose it; same with the knife, wrapped with napkins too with care. Drop to your knees and pull off the strap holding the extinguisher to the wall. This puppy can buy you some time. Can this thing take super cold, ice temperatures? Easy enough to find out. It has pressure and legit distance.

The next was not unexpected - just startling. It pushed inside, breaking a window in the living room. The lights do not do it justice. This is a beast, an upright beast, human sized and utterly vicious. You can see blood in its canine mouth as it looked at you, trying to crawl itself inside. BLAST! Right to the face.

It gave an even louder bellow, but this was the sound of pain. The thing did not like the extinguisher, nor the super cold jolt. You could hear the thing move away from the RV. It was wiping the foam off its face, that sound was audible. But that means this thing will be even more mad. You rush forward and close the day for night blinds.

A second later realizing, that thin fabric won't keep it out. But at least, it can't see you. This pause gave you time to look at the gage. WTF?! WTF? WTF!!! This thing read, less than a quarter remain. The person who owned this tow last, sold it to you - had used the extinguisher frequently. AND PUT IT BACK in place. On what? This is madness. You could die because of some incompetent, wanna be chef who set too many cooking fires.

That noise had stopped, no more stirring. The dust from the extinguisher had settled too.

Now you heard a low pitch growl, long, extended - not for its sake. For you to know. Don't need to have the window open. You can already see it in your mind. It's red eyes, staring at you through the blinds, super ticked off. Once again, your blood turns cold. So glad you went to the bathroom before this happened. No. No. Razors are not going to work on that. What are you gonna do? Shave it to death? The thought gave you a light chuckle, you needed it. You will need it for what happens next.

Week three of "Limited Edition Horror" 2021 has come to slay pesky blood suckers with a two parter, a brand new entry, "Blade Trinity"...



The motion picture opened on December 8th, 2004. It was made with a budget of $65,000,000 (estimated); counting foreign receipts it made $78,955,776. The movie bombed domestically ($52.3 million). The film opened number one at the box office, the following week it dropped to number three.

The feature opened against "The Polar Express", "National Treasure", "Alexander" and "The Incredibles".

This originally was not issued a slipcover, but came with a foil wraparound. Please note, later pressings replaced it with a regular (matted) wraparound. First pressing also came with a single sheet insert; chapter listings, the other side mirrored the DVD's cover. It also came with ad insert for "Wedding Crashers" (2005) and "The Man" ('05) - the other side is a full page advertisement for "The New World" ('O5) with film's poster.

The first pressing also included a bonus mini-comic book which fit inside the case. I'll cover that in a few.

- - -

There was one exclusive and it came from Wal-Mart.



The store sold it on street (April 26th, 2005) as a combo set. It came with a EP CD in its own small long box, the same size as the DVD case. "Blade: Trinity - The Daywalker Mix". This sold for $15.87 (yes, I kept notes). Above right is the non-exclusive comic cover.

Sorry about the poor res combo image. I'm lucky to have that.

If I remember correctly this set was also available for the theatrical cut DVD too. I bought my copy on release day.



1. Blade's Back (The RZA Remix)
2. Thirsty
3. The Nightstalkers
4. Bombs Away (Danny Saber Remix)
4. Bloodthirsty (Thirsty Instrumental)

This was a limited time exclusive, it would later be available on it's own.



As mentioned, this came with a comic book (DVD first pressing). See that cover - know what's missing?

Blade. Being serious.

This is a stand alone, self-contained tale; the prequel to the movie with Abigail Whistler and Hannibal King, how they came about needing HIS help.

"Blade: Night Stalking" is twenty-four pages; written by Jimmy Palmiotti and Justin Gray. Edited by Joe Quesada. Art by Amanda Connier, Palmiotti and Guru EFX.



It's the set-up to "Trinity" with lots of artwork that accentuates Jessica Biel's character femininity. For some this is sacrilegious - I haven't found Biel that attractive. She pretty, sure, but not as hot as so many claim. Too middle of the road to have all those adorations.

By the way, it's listed as the comic as mature because of cursing and gore, no nudity.

- - - - - - - - - -

Rant.

Not gonna sugar coat it. This was the movie that put an end to the "Blade" movie franchise. It is the weakest of the lot. Producers were trying to make a spinoff - MINUS Westley Snipes. He is friggin' Blade! That was so stupid.



The studio got bitched slapped at the box office. Rumor has it; Snipes knew what was going on and was phoning it in. Why bring his A-game when he's getting replaced. Even was getting into fights with director (and co-writer) David S. Goyer. Got so bad, Goyer would not talk to him directly; his exchanges were done by Post-It notes.

Even co-star Kris Kristofferson who played Abraham Whistler had the same sentiments - this was a cash grab, not about making a good feature. Goes even further, the director of the first film (1998), Stephen Norrington dropped the offer to direct after reading the script - that bad.

The bonus features also suffered, Snipes participated very little. You can see it on the featurettes, the shots with the actor look like they came from different sources.

By the way, this was Goyer directorial debut. The movie has solid ideas (grand ideas even), but needed more time to work out the story and should've been about Blade, not trying to spin it off. Yes it could've been worked into it. Sure. But they took short cuts and blindsided audiences who came to see the vampire hunger not new pups.

Goes even more - in 2005 Snipes brought a lawsuit against New Line Cinema, Goyer and executive producer Toby Emmerich. He claimed they did not play his full salary and he was intentionally taken out of filmmaking activity and casting decision... but was one of the producers.



Along with the assertion that his character's screen time was reduced so that the new characters would take center stage - the new franchise the studio and Goyer wanted. All and all he was seeking five million in damages.

This is why Snipes had disappeared from Hollywood; studios didn't want to cast him - troublemaker. Does matter if he was correct. I don't know what became of that - other than it was settled out-of-court, undisclosed amount.

Over the years Snipes has attempted to get another sequel made, a "Blade" movie with him as the star which is what the other films were. His efforts failed. I wish he was successful. For me "Blade II" is one of the best comic book based films made, it was outstanding.



Did not know this until researching - Kate Beckinsale, best known for the "Underworld" films said in 2016 that at one time - there was in development a crossover sequel with Blade and her character, Selene joining forces. This would have been a sequel to "Trinity".

That project was scraped over rights, the Blade property reverted back to Marvel Studios in 2012. Now that could've been sway as hell.