Past Tense - Curse Me, Curse You Part II


It's something that should captivate you, not something rushed to the finale forsaking all things important. Man, you missed the point, which can be said for so many Hollywood remake. I'm looking at you "RoboCop" (2013). Yes I am.

Am I talking like an old man? No.

Things have importance; the glue that binds us. Race, religion, economic background - we all share these silver screen tales. They're the modern fables, teaching us morality and humanity. And what is now served is the lowest common denominator. Yes, it has always existed, but they were peripheral, throwaway fluff. Now it's center stage.

Look at me doing stupid crap on YouTube and Facebook, don't forget to click 'Like'; hash tag #PleaseNeuterMe.

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Okay on to something more mellower.



Who is hotter Rhona Mitra as Sonja (above left) or Kate Beckinsale as Selene?

I know Mitra was one of the first physical models to play Lara Croft. The distinction of being the first belongs to Nathalie Cook (she played Lady Croft before the game became famous, circa 1996). Of the all the models, I like Karima Adebibe the best. And I'm not a gamer. *nods* I just like pretty girls.

*oink!*

Rhona has a nice body, but her face and hands are quite masculine. While Kate overall looks very feminine, from her tush to her head. In a fight who is more believable? Easy, Mitra, hands down. Who looks better doing it, though improbable - Beckinsale. But we're talking about vampires here, so improbability kinda has to take a back seat - Rosa Parks style. Yes, I went there.

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This was directed by Patrick Tatopoulos who like Tom Savini was a special effects man. Tatopoulos did creature effects for such films like "Pitch Black" (2000), "Dark City" (1998), "Independence Day" (1996), "I, Robot" (2004), "Van Helsing" (2004) and a ton others.

Tatopoulos worked on the two pervious "Underworld" films and created the werewolf design used in the franchise. "Rise Of The Lycans" was his directorial debut. He did a good job here. He knows how to shoot effects.

Enjoyed the movie, a prequel, setting up how this hidden universe came to be. The roots of the war between vampires and werewolves. Especially enjoyed was how much continuity was used. Brought back dead characters and other cast members back for bit part. These things make the film quite gratifying. Love and passion went into this.

Not disappointed.

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Tangent.

Save this for last; final sexy Halloween costumes.



This was something I did a record scratch. WTF? The left is... I quote:

Sexy Triage Trixie Nurse Lingerie Costume Set
*blinks*

Sexy triage nurse, that's a thing now. Don't get me wrong. On the right woman, like the above - it is smokin' hot. She's gorgeous. It totally works, sway. But this costume is for nines and tens.

Now, on the right is a costume that's 3D printed. Shown with face paint added (optional). An anatomical, stretch (form fitting) jumpsuit. It like someone thought there's a market for attractive women to showcase their figure, but also be revolting to men at the same time.

Voila!

You get this costume, skin tight and quite unappealing.

Well, this could with some imaginative work be modded into a kick ass, nude undead woman. I'm already thinking of painted props from the 99 Cent Only Store that could be glued or velcroed on. It will take time and patience, plus some loose dollars (on top of the costume price).

Take one of those plastic brains and cutting it in half or just enough to appear like seeping out, the intestines - painted with nail polish, the one that looks wet even though it's dry. Other thoughts too...

Get one of those novelty fake big boob prop, usually sold from Spencers Gifts. Cut into one of the breasts, take a chuck out and make the thing look jagged like someone bit into it, taking flesh out. Make it bloody, get some paper towels and paint them red, let it dry and glue them on the breast around the bite - like some skin are still hanging to it.

Add one of those bag of plastic bones from 99 Cent and break/cut a piece and glue it onto the leg. Like a bit of bone is sticking out. Then go to Goodwill and buy, cheap and thin pants. Cut them up and paint parts red and add that polish too. Glue or stitch them in - to be seen like regular pants on the costume.

The effect is she's wearing pants with damage, leg bone sticking out, bloody. Topless, skin peeled off and breast bitten into, flesh still draping with her intestines starting to spill out. Believe me, that will stand out in a party. Add some minor face paint to look gray or off-white (dark circles under the eyes). A bit of red on one side of the mouth. The extra mile would be adding creepy contacts, but there are many genuine horror stories of contacts infecting the eyes. Poorly made and do serious, I mean serious damage. I would pass on that.

And light paint on the hands too. Or better yet, get cheap gray gloves and give it some spots and streaks of red.

Well... too late for that now. Today is Halloween. Perhaps next year. Just milling some ideas.

One more - discovered an hour before posting... some folks are printing measles, red marks on their skin as their Halloween costume. WTF? That's messed up.

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October 2019 has been about Vincent Prince. Watched several of his flicks I hadn't seen before. Which is saying a lot since I have a bunch of his DVDs. Saw "The Bat" (1959); "Madhouse" (1974); "House On Haunted Hill" (1959), colorized (decent hues); "Cry Of The Banshee" (1970); "Dragonwyck" (1946), "The Mad Magician" (1954), "Tales Of Terror" (1962)...

And "Vincent Price: The Sinister Image" (1987) - unaired episode of "The Sinister Image" which was a cable access show (in the '80s), interviewed folks who make horror, sci-fi and fantasy feature. It's the extended cut. Price talks about his film and passions (art and cooking). I wish it was longer, fascinating.

Some of those were titles I hoarded just for October, DVDs bought earlier this year - save for the Halloween season. Don't think I can top it, future Octobers. Even picked up, brand new - "Brigham Young" (1940) - Price had a small role; the story of Mormons coming to Salt Lake City. Price played Joseph Smith, Jr.

Plus other Halloween flicks (new to me) like, "Murders In The Rue Morgue" (1971), "The Monster Of Piedras Blancas" (1959), "Submerged" (2016) and "The Flesh And The Fiends" (1960; continental version with nudity).

Okay, things that don't mix well - horror and musicals. You might recall the bonus entry from 2017, "Stage Fright". That was awful; weak plot with weaker still songs. What was the point?



Streeted on home video on October 1st of this year was "Anna And The Apocalypse" (2017). Saw it on Saturday. Yes. This actually works. The world is being torn apart from the living dead; have some songs and dance. Before you ask, no dancing or singing zombies. Not 100% great, but does work. I enjoyed it. Gland it was rated R and came down dark, like one of their songs...

"No Such Thing As A Hollywood Ending". The future is unknown and bleak, but that's okay - you're not alone.

By the way, "Dragonwyck" isn't really horror - more of a gothic drama, cut from the same cloth as "Jane Eyre" (1943) - the Orson Welles version.

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Recommendation.

As I wrote, today is Halloween. Far too late for getting a flick. You either have none or already know what you're doing. I'm gonna be watching "Dawn Of The Dead: Extended Mall Hours" bootleg (mixes all the cuts into one - outstanding), a past LEH recommendation. But I wanted to offer, something obscure, something worth the seek. One last 2019 Halloween title...

"Sole Survivor" (1970)
Made for CBS TV movie (aired January 9th, 1970). It was like an extended classic episode of "The Twilight Zone". The time is World War II, an American plane has made it's bombing run in North Africa, but is shot down on their way to their base. The bomber crash lands in the Libyan desert. The middle of nowhere, three hundred miles from help with a busted radio - can't be repaired. Providence - a rescue team is coming. Only to discover, they can't be seen and not a rescue, but military investigation. Investigating a seventeen year old derelict... the men discover, they're ghosts. Now it become proving they didn't die over the Mediterranean sea, but on the scorching sands. Deaths because their navigator bailed out - and got rescued; one of men present for the investigation. On DVD as an MOD title, sadly.
CBS Home Entertainment - 2019 - NR

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Just Because.



Behind-the-scenes pix of Beckinsale on the set of "Underworld 2", she's adorable. What's that stuff on her shoulder? Shhhhh, we don't talk about that. *wink*

Back into the dark place from where they came from... until next October. When they get their strength once more to terrify all who have the misfortune of being in their way. Come back here on November 14th for comedy show that is as much loved as it is despised.